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A lady is sitting in an examining room at her gynecologist's office.
The doctor walks in and says, "Lois, I'm afraid I have some bad news. You are going to have to stop masturbating."
Lois replies, "I don't understand, Doctor Phelps. Why is that?"
Doc says, "because I'm trying to examine you."
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A man get hit by a car while crossing the street. Although he gets to his feet and insists that he's alright, the driver of the car insists on taking him to the minor emergency center. After being examined by the doctor he went home and told his wife all about it.
"What did he tell you?" she asked.
“Well he told me I got a flucky.”
The wife queried, "A flucky? What do you do for that?"
The man answered, "well I guess I forgot to ask him."
The woman went next door and asked, "Lorraine, the doctor told Virgil that he has a flucky. What should I do for that?"
"I think you should put ice on it," came the answer.
She went back to her house, then phoned her sister, and asked her. Her sis responded, "I think you put a heating pad on it."
Hot, cold, she was confused. She phoned the minor emergency and spoke to the doctor. She asked him, "my husband got hit by a car and you told him that he got a flucky, and I wondered how we should treat it?"
“Ma'am," he said slowly, "I told him that he got off lucky.....”
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