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And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning

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  • And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "Bummed about that loss? Wish you had another shot to knock off the undefeated Patriots? Understandable. But don't sweat it. You're still the reigning Super Bowl champ. Yeah, you know it. You're the man. But only for 20 more days. Then you're crap again. So live it up."

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "Throw another tipped pass that was intercepted in the red zone? Too bad. Here's what you need to do: Work on your accuracy. Maybe watch a game tape of Tom Brady for some tips. That guy went 26-for-28. He's awesome. Plus, watching him is easy on the eyes. Total dreamboat."

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "So I hear you're upset about losing at home in the divisional playoffs. Worried people are going to call you a choker again? Don't be. You played well. You just had a few bad breaks. And you were up against a buzz saw. That Billy Volek has never lost in the playoffs. He's a dynamo."

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "Worried that your coach might be retiring? Understandable. You've had success together. But don't sweat it. You call all of your plays at the line of scrimmage anyway. You could be coached by a gerbil."

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "Jealous of your brother? Wish you were him right now? Don't be. Remember growing up how your mom used to change his diapers? Let me let you in on a little secret: He's still wearing them. Yeah. You know it."

    And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:

    "Disappointed that your season ended so soon? Understandable. One-and-done is a bummer. But remember that you have a Super Bowl ring. Your legacy is secure. So use your extra free time to film some more commercials. I think there's a mortuary in Bloomington you don't yet endorse."

  • #2
    Now that's funny.

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