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Just saw these on Facebook and had to share them here:
Q: What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
A: Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.
Q: How many Justices are there on the Florida Supreme Court?
A: No one knows. They are not finished counting yet!
Q. What's the difference between a University of Central Florida sorority sister and a scarecrow?
A. One lives in a field and is stuffed with hay. The other frightens birds and small animals.
Q: Why do Florida State grads keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: What's the best thing to come out of Gainesville?
A: I-75
Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Florida State University library?
A: Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Q: Did you hear about the fire in University of Florida's football dorm that destroyed 20 books? A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
Q: Why couldn't the baby Jesus be born in Florida?
A: Because they couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin.
Q: What does the average Florida State University student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
Q: Did you hear about the Florida Gator fan who tried to blow up the Tennessee team bus?
A: He burned his lip on the tailpipe.
Q: How many Florida State University freshman does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, it's a sophomore course.
Q: Why did Forrest Gump choose 'Bama over University of Florida?
A: He wanted an academic challenge!
Q: How do you make University of Florida cookies?
A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.
Q: If you have a car containing a Seminoles wide receiver, a Seminoles linebacker, and a Seminoles defensive back, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.
Q: What is the definition of safe sex down in Florida?
A: Placing signs on the animals that kick.
Q: How do you casterate an Florida State Seminoles fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: Whats the difference between the Florida Gators and cheerios?
A: One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn't!
Q: Why do Florida students have TGIF on their shoes?
A: Toes Go In First!
Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through the Florida State University campus?
A. An undergraduate degree.
Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned at Florida State University?
A: They cause too much brain damage!
Q: What should you do if you find three University Of Florida football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.
Q: What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
A: Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.
Q: How many Justices are there on the Florida Supreme Court?
A: No one knows. They are not finished counting yet!
Q. What's the difference between a University of Central Florida sorority sister and a scarecrow?
A. One lives in a field and is stuffed with hay. The other frightens birds and small animals.
Q: Why do Florida State grads keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: What's the best thing to come out of Gainesville?
A: I-75
Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Florida State University library?
A: Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Q: Did you hear about the fire in University of Florida's football dorm that destroyed 20 books? A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
Q: Why couldn't the baby Jesus be born in Florida?
A: Because they couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin.
Q: What does the average Florida State University student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
Q: Did you hear about the Florida Gator fan who tried to blow up the Tennessee team bus?
A: He burned his lip on the tailpipe.
Q: How many Florida State University freshman does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, it's a sophomore course.
Q: Why did Forrest Gump choose 'Bama over University of Florida?
A: He wanted an academic challenge!
Q: How do you make University of Florida cookies?
A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.
Q: If you have a car containing a Seminoles wide receiver, a Seminoles linebacker, and a Seminoles defensive back, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.
Q: What is the definition of safe sex down in Florida?
A: Placing signs on the animals that kick.
Q: How do you casterate an Florida State Seminoles fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: Whats the difference between the Florida Gators and cheerios?
A: One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn't!
Q: Why do Florida students have TGIF on their shoes?
A: Toes Go In First!
Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through the Florida State University campus?
A. An undergraduate degree.
Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned at Florida State University?
A: They cause too much brain damage!
Q: What should you do if you find three University Of Florida football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.